Tag Archives: Online Networking

Saddi Dilli de aur Munde

30 Dec

Okay, another amusing exchange today. I really hope my blog doesn’t become rampant with such posts…

Now I’m not asserting that this guy is attractive, nor am I insisting that he’s not. I don’t remember what he looks like, but it is a general observation that Delhi men are hot and brainless, which applies to Crazy Guy (refer previous post) as well. This disclaimer is courtesy Jay who pointed out that it was syntactically wrong…

1. Crazy Guy 2  28. Dec. 2009
hi
how are u doing?
Marry christmass and happy new year
i am <John Hopkins> here at s delhi and i am looking for a good frien and fun as well
i like trust worthy, honest mature and kind hearted frien

I do not grace it with a response, and 2 days pass…

2. Crazy Guy 2 30. Dec. 2009
hi
how are u doing today?
Marry christmass and happy new year
i am <John Hopkins> here at s delhi
and i am looking for a good friend and fun aw well
i likw mature trust worthy and honest friend also i like kind hearted friend

3. me
I’m very happy to hear that John, and I wish you all the best in finding it…

4. Crazy Guy 2
Hansome
whare are u?
what all are u looking for and what do u like?

5. me
Looking for nothing, like peace and quiet 🙂

6. Crazy Guy 2
great what all do u like?

7. me
Italian food, Long Island Ice Tea and The Big Bang Theory.

8. Crazy Guy 2
great what i mean is what do u like in bed

9. me
A nice cosy blanket, fluffy pillow and one of the mattresses that one just sinks into…

Thankfully, silence follows…

Saddi dilli de Munde

29 Dec

One cannot deny that Delhi has among the best looking men in the country. It’s tragic that most of them are so brainless. For example…

1. CrazyDude
Hi

2. Me
Hellew

3. CrazyDude
HEW HI

4. Me
What’s “Hew Hi”?

5. CrazyDude
HEY HI MEANS HOW R U

6. Me
Does it? That’s new.
I’m good, thanks. Et vous?

7. CrazyDude
SORRY WHATS THAT

8. Me
And you?
Why are you writing in Capitals, though? It’s the online equivalent of SCREAMING

9. CrazyDude
YEAH SORT OF

10. Me
YOU’RE SORT OF SCREAMING AT ME?

11. CrazyDude
NO GIVE ME UR NO.

12. Me
ERR.. NO

13. CrazyDude
WHY

14. Me
BECAUSE YOU’RE STILL YELLING, AND I DON’T LIKE IT

15. CrazyDude
is this fine

16. Me
Much better, but I’m going to pass anyway. It was nice screaming at each other.

17. CrazyDude
okkkkkkkkkkk

Can you really blame me for whining?

How shallow art thou, really?

2 Dec

So a week or two back, the UnsungPsalm thought it was finally time to take the gigantic step and publish unaltered, unphotoshopped snaps of his on his online dating profile.

Initially, it didn’t take. The “know-it-all” and “pretend-arrogant” expressions didn’t quite attract too much attention. Then yesterday, he altered the snaps in favour of those with a more benign expressions. In practically no time, there were countless messages coming in, each with a similar rhythm. “You’re hot”… and “How much for one night?” (Yes, I know! Eww!) not to forget “Man of my dreams” and “On my wavelength”…

I really don’t mean to show-off (Honest! Okay, maybe just a teeny-weeny bit)… But it’s so disturbing. None of these fellows responded as well to the content of my profile… Does a face make all that difference? Can one only be appreciated for what one looks like, in this community?

Like, wow! I surely see a bright future for the likes of me </Sarcasm>

Absurdities of Online Networking

27 Jan

So I took the morning off from college, and logged onto my profile on the networking site and changed the location to the place I shall be visiting for the rest of the week.

It didn’t take long for people to pounce! Golly, and they were a lot.

The first guy I spoke to was rather interesting. He was an NRI returned to India and a little over 30. It was quite a break finding someone who could speak the language, though he tried to taunt me for “belonging to the British Royal family” when we started out.
Anyway, we were making casual conversation when I popped the question of whether he was out to his folks (at his age!!)
To which he responded that he wasn’t. And then told me that he was married… like Wow! A guy educated so well, living abroad for several years goes ahead and marries a woman. And he assured me that I was too young to understand, and would have to face it myself some day. Clearly, the bride’s families need to perform a better background check nowadays.

Simultaneously, the following elapsed with another dude …
____

The Dude: hello
what are you looking for?
Me: A diamond brooch.
The Dude: i have it with me…. when i can show it to you?
Me: how about now?
The Dude: why not – where? what is the secret code?
Me: India gate.
The code is “I’m gay”
The Dude: mmmmmmmm……
india gate is an hour drive from – so is 12:30PM in
front of india gate ok?
what will u be wearing – so that i can identify you?
or a face pic of yours would do
Me: I’ll be wearing a bottle green bathing suit.
The Dude: mmmm………. that will suit you darling…. it will look much
better than the pink dress you wore last time
Me: Huh?
That was you, hun.
The Dude: any way – take care – let me see if i can have some
serious conversation here
Me: right… tc

____

And finally…

Another Dude : hi 24 m see me and send me ur pic
Me : Hi Dude,
I’m flattered that you trust me with your picture, but I’m neither
interested in hookups, nor in sending my pics out to strangers…
Dude : whats ur name send me ur pic
Me : My name is death, and if I send you my pic, yours will be up on a
wall.
Dude : what ??/
Me : Never you mind.

___

Haha… This surely can be fun!

Anyway, I’m off in an hour. Will stay in touch through my phone.

Bbye all!