Acceptance Begins at Home

28 Jun

I’d strategically left the news running all day, beginning from the afternoon.

Dad and I were watching, when the Pride coverage finally came on…

Dad: I should’ve been walking there instead of sitting at home… Show some support

(Needless to say, I was completely caught off guard and absolutely delighted!)

Mom: WHY? Are you homosexual??

Me: Wha! Hey, hello! They’re not all homosexuals over there… The pride is for homosexuals and supporters!

A little while later…

Dad: Sigh! It’s so much easier for them, not having to have to run after women.
Mom: Have some shame! Listen to what you’re saying in front of your son… Is this what you want to teach him? Can’t get a woman, so go after a man instead…

I kept sniggering to myself, completely scandalised (in a pleasant way) with dad’s comments.

Mom: What are you laughing at?
Me: You guys…. you’re just too much!
Mom: What do you mean??
Me: *more sniggers* Never you mind, never you mind…


22 Responses to “Acceptance Begins at Home”

  1. Orange June 29, 2009 at 12:04 am #

    Well at least your family is accepting about it. πŸ™‚

    Don’t worry about spending awkward moments in gay bars all alone. Happens to the best of us.

  2. Only my rants June 29, 2009 at 9:40 am #

    Wow.. thats a positive sign! I guess ur dad has a bit of idea n thats why want to check ur reactions.. If even its not the case, expect supoprt from your dad (Mom will take time it seems πŸ™‚ )
    Anyways, good for u! πŸ™‚

  3. unsungpsalm June 29, 2009 at 9:52 am #

    As OMR mentioned, not so much the family as much as my dad. He’s a gem, he is! Not a perfect person, but a perfect human being!
    Anyway, I never thought I’d be so lost among gay people as well. Was just very disturbing.

    Yes, you’re absolutely right! He’s a smart fellow and I’m sure he’s that perceptive.
    Ironically, my mom is instinctive so I thought she’d have a better idea. All the more because she reads my SMSes once a while, and I often forget to delete a lot of suggestive ones!
    But she’s either too thick-skinned or in denial…

  4. chandni June 29, 2009 at 9:57 am #


  5. v June 29, 2009 at 2:17 pm #

    a perfect coup d’eat…. u initiated the talk… πŸ™‚

  6. BlueMist June 29, 2009 at 2:22 pm #

    Great start ! and so comforting to know at least 50% of your world is on your side. YAY !! πŸ™‚

  7. Meghana Naidu June 29, 2009 at 2:40 pm #


    i remember once when i mentioned the word ‘gay’ in a conversation, and not even w.r.t someone, my mom was horrified.
    and then i realised it was because she didnt know what that “meant” not that i could manage to convincingly explain it to her right then *insert zombie look* or that her reaction would ‘improve’ instantly *snort*

    But the fact that she resented a word which she didnt even fully understand was sad indeed.

    Now my mom is very much a well educated woman with a modern outlook on most things but i think she’s never had to deal with any scenario requiring understanding of homosexuality.

    And another crucial factor is that she is a teacher, who deals with pre-teen/teenagers on a everyday basis, So you can imagine how damaging half/incorrect knowledge of this would be in sensitive issues.
    SO i took it upon myself to try and ease in the truth, so far ive had limited success but im not going to stop trying.

    phew! that was a long one! but i had to share it πŸ™‚

    and coming back to you [ πŸ˜› ] YAY! πŸ™‚

  8. Dark Knight June 29, 2009 at 4:46 pm #

    Good… you dad seems to very cool …

    i guess it wont be so hard πŸ™‚

  9. BlueMist June 29, 2009 at 5:34 pm #

    I had to share this while we are on it. When I asked a lady whom I think as quite broad minded and has balanced thoughts; about a person being a gay; the response I got was “Wahyat harkatein” !!
    and then I talked abt it being a natural thing and blah blah. and posed a question “what if one’s own kid turns out gay? ”
    then the response was suddenly changed ” Kya kar sakate hai ; accept to karna padega !! ”
    Well..hummm…not bad ! πŸ™‚

  10. JH June 29, 2009 at 6:46 pm #

    That’s fantastic. Certainly directionally great…hope all is well otherwise?

  11. unsungpsalm June 29, 2009 at 10:30 pm #


    I really didn’t! He sorta did πŸ˜‰

    There’s hope! But I never thought he’d be hard to crack, either way. He’s a lovely human being.

    I know! Yay!

    Pre-teens? OMG, she should TOTALLY be aware, educated and sensitized! Very crucial indeed! You keep up the good work, girl :-*

    I certainly hope so…

    Hehe… She was certainly open-minded. I suppose (unfortunately) a person does have to be made aware!

    It’s all good, JH! How’re YOU doing? I hear from you once in 6 months!!!

  12. Vlad June 29, 2009 at 11:30 pm #

    Your dad sounds really cool!

  13. DewdropDream June 30, 2009 at 1:43 am #

    Super! πŸ˜€

  14. Daksh June 30, 2009 at 2:15 pm #

    I think for some reason dads in the indian context are often more accepting than moms

    Moms tend to view your gayness as an affront to them and their parenting and feel a lot more guilt about it, especially if they were more active than dads in bringing you up. this could be for a variety of reasons.

    a) They view it as a lack of trust in them- they thought themselves to be closer to you and felt like they should have known, so when it comes out of the blue they think they must have made a mistake
    b) They think youre gay/turned off from girls/dislike women sexually because of them/sticking too close to them.So they feel guilty that they interacted with you so much and made you “feminine”
    c)Women dislike casual sex more than guys do. As guys we are horny pretty much all the time, which is something even the heteros belonging to the same sex as us recognise. Unfortunately, people often confuse sexuality with sex and assume that if you are explicitly defining yourself in terms of your sexuality, that means you are thinking about/having a lot of sex, which is something she might be uncomfortable with as a women. Think of it this way, your parents, esp. your mom would find the mental vision of you having sex as icky as you would find the thought of your parents having sex.

    I am just basing this off my experience with my parents as well as of some friends with their parents, so it might not be applicable in your situation

  15. Pesto Sauce June 30, 2009 at 7:44 pm #

    I had thought initially you will be part of this parade

    You haven’t come out to your folks yet?

  16. unsungpsalm June 30, 2009 at 7:50 pm #

    Oh, he’s an amazing, kind and goodhearted fellow!

    I know πŸ˜€

    Hell, I don’t think so!
    Besides, my mom tried to do everything in her power to make me more “masculine”! Basically, nagged a lot about playing sports, making more male friends etc. etc. So she won’t hold that against herself πŸ˜‰
    But she’s just from a slightly more conservative background, it seems…
    And I’ve already talked about having sex in front of her. Though she understood it as sex with a woman. She wasn’t very comfortable hearing it, lol!

    I was supposed to be, but I had an engagement that evening that I couldn’t skip out of. And apparently there was a lot of media, so I suppose it sort of worked out. I won’t miss it for the world, next year.

    And no, I’m not out to my folks at all!

  17. Swats July 1, 2009 at 12:16 am #


  18. Firebolt July 1, 2009 at 3:01 am #

    Cheers for your Dad! At least he makes it up for your sister’s immaturity. πŸ™‚

  19. unsungpsalm July 1, 2009 at 7:31 am #

    That’s because my dad and I are of the same breed, while my sister and mom are of another!

  20. Firebolt July 1, 2009 at 11:40 am #


    My sister and I are leagues apart in many ways.

  21. Nikita July 3, 2009 at 1:57 pm #

    hey thats comfortingly surprising. I believe you wont have a tough time after all when you come out to them

  22. unsungpsalm July 3, 2009 at 3:36 pm #

    Well, mine doesn’t rock as much as yours, in that department!

    Not from dad’s side, I guess πŸ™‚

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