“Don’t Leave Home”

10 Jan

Before I wrote my next night-before-departure post (which is this), I thought I’d give the last one I wrote a few months ago, a read. I won’t deny that I got pretty freaked out.

The past 2 days have been really depressing. It’s extremely hard to leave Mom behind alone with the situation that she’s caught in. And the thought of her possibly living alone for some time in the next few months while dad is away from work is even scarier. The lesser I think about it the better, because the longer it stays in my mind, the more I want to hold her close and never let go.
I do not know how far away the day is when I’ll be able to sit her on her throne, give her every luxury and comfort she could ask for and make her as happy as anyone could. Because that’s what that woman truly deserves. Life has been so cruel to put her through all that she has endured. When will her struggle end? Because I’m willing to struggle to make that happen.
Yet, I have to leave her behind once again, and go away. This time round, she and I have bonded more than ever before. Tomorrow at the station, I won’t know how to let go. On the other hand, things will be so awkward with Dad because we’ve never been this distant before.

Delhi, Oh Delhi. What is it about you that enamours me so? I did not have a happy childhood here, I never saw any other days. College got me some good friends, some good fun. But lately, most of that has gone away. What’s left? I do not know. Studies. Competition. Confusion. Loneliness.

I’m so depressed, I’m so depressed. Won’t someone rescue me? Where is there respite? Where is there direction?

I see none.


2 Responses to ““Don’t Leave Home””

  1. vivek January 10, 2009 at 10:49 pm #

    Leaving back to college huh? Man, my days are nearing too :C

  2. unsungpsalm January 10, 2009 at 11:27 pm #

    You dislike your college town too?!
    I don’t like mine because it has no gay scene. What’s your excuse?

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